Understanding the heart Affinity

A beautiful, sincere, trust-building word is the fragrant flower in the garden of human civilization.

The ancients used to remind: "Words don't cost money / Choose words to please each other." We already have a very valuable asset that can make the people who live next to us happy and happy without spending money or effort, which is lovely speech. It is true that the nature of words cannot express the depths of affection or the infinity of truth, but it is necessary to support each other in difficult times. Gentle and warm words emanating from a peaceful heart and respectful attitude, not only create a pleasant feeling, but can also soothe and support the listener greatly. When we express ourselves outwardly with actions or words consistent with what's happening in our minds, its energy is amplified many times over. Therefore, a sincere word, conveying peaceful energy, is truly a tonic to help each other quickly recover health and spirit.

Because we are engrossed in our private interests, we have long forgotten the habit of complimenting each other. Sometimes we're afraid that they'll judge our level as just getting there, so we don't ask for them anymore, or we're afraid they'll look down on us when we seem content with them. But the reality is that everyone wants to be sincerely and properly recognized and complimented by others for what they have tried to achieve. Especially the praise of someone they love and trust. Although they are not perfect, it is our words of support that will give them more confidence to reach perfection. Praising someone else's strengths honestly, unconditionally, shows that we've overcome our complacency and prejudice against that person. We have seen and confirmed their true value.

Remember, beauty (beauty) must be born of the true (truthful) and good (good) to be true beauty. When we try to please the other person with polished words that our hearts don't think about or want to say, although it creates momentary pleasant feelings, we inadvertently cover each other with curtains of separation. We see many people practicing extremely skillful and attractive speech. It seems that they always have a "jar of honey" on their lips, so it is easy to make others fall in love when persuaded by them. Even when they don't like us or don't like us, we can't guess. It's also a makeup for the ego, using one good emotion to exchange with another. Only those who lack sophistication and lack confidence fall into that trap. While the nature of affection must be constructive, trust and love for each other.

There are many people who just like to live with the real and not focus on beauty. They think that living beautifully without being real is the wisest deception. Therefore, they speak very frankly to clearly express what they want to say, even if it breaks the hearts of others. It is true that truth is the most precious thing in the world. If he had to choose between beauty and the real, the knowledgeable would of course choose the real. But reality isn't always as ideal as we think. If we live alone, we don't say anything. Here the loved one living next to us is not good enough or very weak, and if we make them accept extremely unpleasant feelings all the time just because they are real, they will be very dissatisfied. Therefore, with honest words alone, we will not be strong enough to support or lead others.

The best is still the harmonious combination of beauty and reality. As in the case of letting the other person know the truth that can cause them to collapse instantly, it is imperative that we use tactful words to hide it. Failing to do so is irresponsible, we are at great fault. Of course, we don't forget to find a way to return the truth when they are truly receptive. There are many people who do not have the ability to use beautiful words, every time they speak up, others feel very heavy and tired. However, they take great pride in thinking they are living the real thing. The truth is only in the service of selfishness, without a sense of respect or help to others, is not the truth of truth.

Affection is also very careful speech when commenting. Even if we know that the other person's abilities have not been achieved or that they have acted wrongly, we must not give ourselves the right to blame arbitrarily. A cold statement like: "Stop talking. Go die", or bluntly remark: "Nothing", or a judgment: "Useless", or a spiteful "No" to reject the request can hurt the other person or push them into the abyss. Although we have no malice, in a moment of frustration or narcissism, we let go of very toxic emotions. Remember that words are always on the lips, just a slight agitation of external circumstances will make it jump out on behalf of emotions. No matter what we speak for, words are enough to clearly show our level of knowledge and morality. Therefore, words are also the ones who expose our weaknesses in the most unexpected way.

Heart-wrenching speech often comes from momentary feelings of anger, as a kind of easy and effective defensive response. But when we calm down, we always feel regret, especially when we know that we blamed someone else. Unfortunately, the other person believed that all these words came from my true thoughts, so they stuck in their hearts. While our sincere remorse may move them and accept it, the truth is that they are not easily forgotten. It is still deeply imprinted in the heart. It's true that words aren't all of who we are, but it's not true to say they're not ours. We have to take responsibility for everything we've created, even if it's just a word.

If we find that our way of speaking is too clumsy, and each time we say it only causes more misunderstanding or hurt others, we should practice silence for a while to reflect on ourselves. We should also let our loved ones who live next door know, so that they don't have questions and keep the space quiet during times when we can't use words to communicate. If necessary, we should also put the four words "practice silence" on our shirts so that we do not be accidentally harassed by others. We should also turn off our phones, not chat on the internet, and stay away from any means that make us more likely to react, speak or think. In case of extreme necessity, we should just write down the paper, not rush to open the words. Because we are determined to practice absolute silence for three days or a week to reflect and modify our feelings, our interest in speaking, our common words, and our behavior. During the internship, we need to reduce our work so that we have more opportunities to face our minds and observe them more deeply. If we don't, we inadvertently use our work to kill the silent practice period, we will distort the purpose.

While doing anything, we should try to do it a little slower than usual, to observe how our attitude is reflected in the work. We should practice smiling whenever we see passing emotions or thoughts that arise in our minds, even when they urge us to speak or act. We need a diary to record all those reaction sequences. Especially when we want to speak up to reflect on something, even if it's dark thoughts coming from deep corners. When we have some energy to observe, we should look at our complacent or authoritarian habits. Because those disturbing emotions are often the main reason why we can't speak nicely. Although we have no one to be a partner, if we observe subtly, we will also recognize these disturbing emotions when we encounter small unsatisfactory things of our own making. Accept and understand them.

If we practice seriously and properly, we get to know ourselves a lot during these silent days. We will not be startled to realize that we have only been chasing external objects for so long, so we do not know that we have formed very frightening perceptions and habits in our minds. We used to think that we never looked down on anyone, but we don't know why we lack respect when talking to people who are weaker than us. Just as we always think we don't hate them, we still don't understand why we can't use soft words with them like we do with friends or clients. By stopping and looking deeply, we discover that we once felt that we were so important, talented and contributing, that we gave ourselves the right to speak at our own discretion without caring about the feelings of others. Because of our selfishness, we are not determined to give up our habit of speaking gruffly and rudely, in order to bring peaceful and fresh energy to our loved ones living next door, even though they have asked us countless times.

When we start speaking again, we should keep a slow pace so that we can hear each word clearly and observe our attitude. From time to time, stop to take a close look at your emotions and thoughts if you find yourself speaking at speed. At first we will feel a little uncomfortable. Because we're used to talking casually, or finishing to achieve our goals, we mostly only pay attention to the other person's reaction. But patiently practice for a few weeks, and we will find that we have noticeable changes. We will feel our voice more clearly, fullly, and surely. We feel more confident and comfortable talking to powerful people. The unexpected thing is that our relationships will improve very quickly. Especially those who live next door will be very grateful and admire our sense of responsibility.

What's even more interesting is that we suddenly realize that every word, when placed within a reasonable range of observation, creates great power. It can both capture violent energies and lift up weak souls. Therefore, a beautiful, sincere, trust-building word is the fragrant flower in the garden of human civilization. And only those who live permanently in wakefulness possess it.

Magical
love energizes each other
Like a pure water
Relieves pain.